Coming Soon To Your Grocer’s Freezer

If someone had ever said to me, “I don’t believe it is possible that a marketing agency could create an advertisement about microwaveable meals that successfully evokes the idea of risky, anonymous oral sex in the bathroom stall of a bus station.”

My reply would have been, “On the contrary. I think it is inevitable.”

Spotted in a local grocery store, 9-21-09.

A 12-Course Meal Would Probably Kill You

Advertisement placed in the premiere issue of Life Magazine (November 1936).

Click the picture to make it as big as that spot on your lungs the Doctor found on the X-Ray.

I’d be surprised if anyone attending that meal made it to the New Year. Lying, lying, lying Government-enabled Corporate monsters. If only they would have gone the way of the housing market.

Waste lots, want not

As consumers people are getting used to the increasing amount of advertising that appears next to, above and even on the products they buy and they are getting good at ignoring the information overload. It is also that after each purchase the customer is bombarded with one last plea to get their money before they leave the register by the use of secondary printers on each check stand that spit out coupons and advertisements shortly before they receive their receipt.

While sometimes as annoying as those subscription cards in magazines at least coupons have the possibility that it might be recycled in some manner when the offered discount causes a customer to return and buy the featured item. What is maddening is the increase in useless advertising that prints out along with and sometimes in lieu of coupons.

Once items are scanned at a register the coupons and ads begin to print out. In conjunction with a discount card that identifies the shopper targeted discounts and coupons will be applied and printed. But there are failures in the system. Ads, often duplicates of two or more, will print out promoting the very same product the customer just purchased. Considering how intimately the buying habits of each customer are tracked the seeming randomness of the advertising is causing a consumer backlash. The message is getting drowned in a sea of junk spam at the register. Additionally, the coupon dispenser beeps with false error messages that prompts the cashier and customer to pay attention to the device and printing ads. While the false error tone is intended to signal the end of the coupons being dispensed the real result is that the public is being desensitized by “false negatives” and are ignoring the messages altogether.

The coupons and ads have become such an annoyance that by the end of a shift each cashier has a full trash can of strips of paper the customers refused to accept. The avalanche of ads and coupons are the treeware version of email spam. Most customers just leave the junk print outs behind. Many cashiers act as content filters for the spam by sorting and applying to the purchases only those print outs that are immediately useful such as cash back or used to get a discount during the purchase for items they are buying. While the intended use of the coupons and ads are to get return business, customers appreciate more receiving an instant discount than a ream of useless paper they will never use on their next shopping trip.

Other than the annoyance of the ads and coupons that often print out during each transaction the spamming of a shopper shows how much lip service some companies pay to being “green”. Not to suggest that the two companies in the advertising examples above are not fully committed to managing their use of the environment wisely. The coupons are printed out via a service they subscribe to in order to make consumers aware of their products and discounts. However, any company committed to being “green” should be responsible enough to be aware of just how much waste is generated by their vendors and affiliates.

Just think, if just one 6-inch ad is printed out during each transaction, times 3000 customers a day at each store, times 2400 stores nation-wide that is…Well, someone else can do the math. That’s the result of waste from just from one company. That is a lot of paper. That much waste seems not only criminal, but sinful as well.

Waiting for the DVD box set

One of the aspects of concern to the comic book industry are those fans who, rather than read their funny books piecemeal, prefer to wait for the collected edition to be published. This is done for various reasons but I don’t like my comic books that way. I don’t want to wait 6 months for an event to be over to read it, I need my weekly fix.

I am however starting to understand that philosophy when it comes to television shows.

Years ago before cable television the Station Identification spot was something done between commercials. Since there were basically only 3 major networks and one or two others in a local market it was more to comply with broadcasting regulations than to remind the viewer what network they were tuned to. Later, as a hundred or more stations became available cable networks were rightly concerned that viewers didn’t know, could not keep track or cared what station they were watching. So the channel identifier began to appear. The channel identifier was originally a logo that remained in the picture somewhere and was initially received as annoying and intrusive. It usually hovered in the lower right corner of the screen. It made people angry and also discouraged some people from copying a show on VHS. For a time it was thought the logo would turn off those who watched recorded shows and also served to mark any recording as a copy and not an original tape.

Very quickly providers responded to the complaints that the logo was in the way and was degrading enjoyment of their shows. Of the few channels I watched back then the SciFi network was the most clever in how they used the logos. When a show returned from a commercial break the logo appeared in full view and remained for only a few moments before fading to near invisibility, appearing as a watermark which could be easily ignored. After a few years most providers realized the channel identifier was a wasted opportunity for advertising. Now that people were used to the logo on the screen the companies felt that the opportunity to annoy their customers was something that could not be overlooked. The small logo became once again bothersome and intrusive.

With increasing frequency animated banner ads slide, linger and flicker across the television screen during a show. The amount and style of the advertisements have become ridiculous. In the two examples provided here from the SciFi channel the ads take up about half the screen and each one lingers for a few seconds too long. Formerly a minor nuisance they are now large enough and intrusive enough to ruin the enjoyment of watching a show. There have been instances on some networks and this show that I personally witnessed when a prop or reveal of a dramatic moment has been eclipsed by an advertisement for some upcoming program or appeal to buy items from the show at the official website.

So after watching Stargate: Atlantis last night and getting all cranky I decided from now on to pretty much wait for the season DVD to be issued before watching that show again and a few others I follow. The ever-present channel logo, is for the most part something I can ignore with little difficulty. But now the logos are now routinely used as the anchors for spamming banner ads and pop-ups for various shows and products, something that has caused entire computer companies to be created to combat on our personal computers.

I’m only one ornery dude but there are a lot of people on the fence about turning on their televisions anyway and regular viewership numbers are constantly falling even against new content and more channels than ever before. Maybe these companies need to think about not irritating their viewership and customers any more than they absolutely have to. After all, using a simple browser add-on removes 99% of all advertising and spam from internet sites and people routinely hack past the commercials on their digital television recorders. Given the technology available to the average consumer I’d propose that it wouldn’t take much for the Era of Advertising to be entirely a thing of the past.

I didn’t realize Photoshop had an "Attention Whore" add-on

Found in various Marvel Comics Group magazines with a cover date of November 2008 are some advertisements for a nice, upbeat and empowering clothing line for young women that could possibly also appeal to non-comic book fans.

Then, insider gag about the Invisible Woman aside, some tool had to go and ruin it.

The Most Exciting Place on Earth

On occasion advertising, even those generated from large agencies, will contain an error or two in their presentation. A minor failure in proofreading, clarity or sheer carelessness will sometimes allow a conceptual goof to slip by the watchful eyes of the editors and creative staff. When that happens the results can be dumbfounding, unintentionally hilarious or insulting and offensive.

What usually occurs is careful and well-considered art and copy specifically designed to attract attention both consciously and unconsciously. These artfully crafted messages that could be construed as an innocent coincidence usually rely upon promoting a product through sex or sexual situations. Take for example this plug for Disneyland & California Adventure theme parks “2 Fer” gift card promotion. It features a little kid straining to pull a sword out of an anvil. Or he’s showing Dad just who the man in the family really is.

The horses in the background are a nice touch, also. I don’t recall a carousel being at at either park but I admit it has been a few years since I’ve visited them.

There are no mistakes in advertising.