With my birthday coming up in the next couple of weeks the wife asked me what I wanted as a gift. Without hesitation I told her I want bed covers embroidered on the side with the phrase CONTINUED AFTER NEXT PAGE.
When the wife asked for what purpose I could possibly want anything like that I informed her that it was so I could throw myself sobbing on the bed in order to perfectly emulate this comic book panel from Personal Love #2 (Nov-Dec 1958).
I don’t think a day would pass where I wouldn’t act out the scene at least twice.
I’ll probably just get a new Leatherman or Gerber multi-tool, though. My wife doesn’t get my humor.
Optical illusion and a lesson in physics from Western Round-Up #10 (June-July 1955).
I generally like magic but I trend more to the performance art style of magic that Penn & Teller use in their acts, the kind of stunts that mess with people’s heads. I really enjoy the slight of hand that Teller performs in the old acts.
Want to do some performance-magic, Sleestak-style? Okay, for the first time anywhere let me reveal the secret of the famous He’s About To Go Postal Trick:
- Get an old doll with hair that closely resembles yours.
- Clip off a few locks of the doll hair.
- Go to work, concealing some of the hair in one hand before you enter your workplace.
- Wait for the first co-worker to greet you, preferably one with a small group.
- When they greet you, tremble, clutch both hands to your head and say, “Dammit! The sound of your voice just makes me want to…AAAAGH!”
- Pretend to rip some of your hair out and slowly open the hand containing the lock of doll hair, letting it slowly fall to the floor.
- Then reveal to your audience that it was a sleight of hand gag, enjoy the accolades and back-slapping. Some high-fiving may occur. Hot, lonely women may want to party with you.
Note: I don’t recommend anyone actually do this. I’m merely revealing my secret. Leave performance art magic to the professionals. I am not responsible for firings, punishment, censure, trauma or SWAT teams being deployed if anyone actually performs this trick. IT’S NOT MY FAULT!